Was feeling Christmasy tonight....

So I drew you a Christmas tree :)

You're welcome!!  Merry Christmas! (I think it was the rum and eggnog today that made me feel better about Christmas)

Pretty Sure Christmas = Fat

So it's almost Christmas and I've been doing really good at getting to the gym and/or doing Zuzana's Workouts I have even stopped eating my regular amount of junk food and now eat more vegetables.  You would think that would be a good thing with a Mexican vacation and a Christmas holiday with my sister who is pretty much the best baker ever!  But no....I am gaining weight rather than losing it.  I initially tried to tell myself that it is muscle but really the jiggle is all still jiggly so I really need to let that dream die.  I'm not exactly a Christmas person.  Not really in the spirit this year at all  No tree...I have a few wintery decorations:

And I brought Melton out of his summer storage (his name is Melton - it says so on his tag):

but that is as Christmasy as I am getting this year as I'm not looking forward to the Christmas weight gain. 

My New Years Resolution is already in place.....lose some weight!  I have decided that the gym is going to be a MUST 2-3 days a week and I need to lose the wine until my trip in February.  So no alcohol from New Year's Day until February 19.  That is the initial goal.  Will most likely have to give it up from February until June as well if I expect to fit into any of my summer clothes. 

It's just depressing, getting older.  I used to have fantastic metabolism.  Guess this is what happens at 30!

So Pre-New Years resolution is just to not go crazy with my sister's baked goods next week!  For anyone who has ever had my sister's baking - that is a definite challenge.  I would take any other advice offered though.

Is that a warm brown or a golden brown?

So tonight was my very first attempt at home hair colouring. I think. It was a bad decision on my part but it really isn't terrible. No more grey! but my hair is a weird reddish brown colour instead of the pretty chestnut brown that the girl on the front of the box had. I'm also upset that those little pieces of fake hair that they show you as a color sample are deceiving. It is obviously not human hair and I'm not sure what colour they started with. So after staring at all the boxes of colour at the store for what felt like an hour but was really only about 15 minutes, I decided for a first timer I should go with a semi-permanent colour. That narrowed. My choices to only 3 brands. This is a big relief to someone who is indecisive. I decided on this stuff (mainly, I think, because the girl on the box was pretty and the box had pink on it and I'm drawn to pink):

Now I know very little about colouring hair.  I know you can't dye blonde hair black or black hair blonde without going green or orange.  I know that if you are working with reds and blondes that you have to take the red foils out first because it will turn the blonde pink.  I also know that my hair grows far too fast to pay $160 every time I get overwhelmed with grey.  I don't know if colouring hair at home is a good choice or if some things are better left to the professionals.

I figured I would make less mess with a cream version but in reality I don't know if that's right or wrong because my bathroom looks like someone took a dog in who had just rolled in a mud puddle and let it shake itself off 5 or 6 times. 

The tub (where I chose to rinse the color) got the worst of it and I totally don't feel like cleaning the bathtub right now.  Hopefully it doesn't stain. 

So, in the end, my hair is a weird shade of reddish brown that is obviously not natural but doesn't look totally horrible.  They should totally have a professional colourist standing in the hair colour aisle at every drug store to tell people what colour their hair will turn.  This was not my ideal shade.  On the positive side, it was only $12 rather than $160; took 1/2 hour instead of 2 hours (the box said 10 minutes but I don't think they account for beginners); and the little bottle of conditioner they throw in with it is absolutely fantastic.  I've paid more than $12 for conditioner before so that is my justification.  Now if only I can find the justification to buy the awesome $300 boots I saw at Browns this week......sigh.

The King's Speech

So, rarely have I seen a movie that I want to tell everyone I know to go and see. Tonight,I Saw one of those movies. Think the last movie I liked this much was Slumdog Millionaire a couple years ago. The movie I am referring to is The King's Speech starring Colin Firth. Not only should Firth win the Oscar for best actor, but the cinematographer should also get nods. You can watch the trailer here. Totally a movie worth spending money to see.

Another Charmin Bears commercial

th

The new toilet paper dilemma?

So have you seen the new Charmin commercials with the bears?  The new problem with toilet paper apparently is that they leave bits of toilet paper stuck to your ass. I don't know, but I have never had this occur. Is there a new sticky toilet paper epidemic of which I am not aware? How much toilet paper and with what effort do you need in order to have this problem? Seems silly to me. The softness commercials were much better.

Forgot the best part....

I was too busy whining about the boy issues last time that I forgot the best parts of the story of the night.

So my friend Chris and I decide to go to the bar and it's not downtown. As we had already, by this time, consumed numerous bottles of wine between us so our only form of transportation is the train and our feet. So we take the train to the nearest station and figure we can walk the remaining 7 blocks. (In hindsight, this was probably not the best idea from the outset as we were both wearing 4 inch heels but the alcohol lessened any pain I think as we eventually made it.) so we're about 4 blocks in and walking along Macleod Trail and get to the Holiday Inn when this car full of people is pulling out of the parking lot;however the car appears to stop to let us out as they were attempting to make a left hand turn onto Macleod Trail (good luck with that). So Chris, who is walking on the outside steps around the front of the car and I had every intention of being right behind her but all of a sudden the car starts driving again and throws her into Macleod Trail (which if you're not from Calgary is a busy street)and knocks her down where everything falls out of her purse.

I started frantically banging on the side of the car because - I mean REALLY?! there are 4 people in the car can you not see two girls walking along the street - not even one of you? - I don't want them to run her over!

Eventually, the driver sees her and jumps out of the car asking if we want to call an ambulance.  Poor Chris is in complete shock but luckily, thanks to some good wine beforehand, uninjured.  So I throw a little fit at the guy for not seeing her and we continue to walk after she's picked up everything that she can get to from the street. 

We make it to the bar and walk in to the coatcheck counter to pay to get in.  The lady working tells us it's $7 to get in.  Chris then proceeds to turn her purse inside out and all her money drops on the counter where she counts out $6 and tries to barter her way in for $6 instead of $7.  Really not a classy bar so don't understand the $7 price tag but whatever.  Was funny to see her argue with the lady. 

Lady: "It's $7 each"

Chris: "I have $6"

Lady: "It costs $7"

Chris:  "I understand it is $7 but I only have $6 now so I can get in for $6?"

Lady:    "No, I can see you only have $6 but you will need to find another dollar"

Chris:   "But I DO have $6, that's close"

Lady:   "Close, but not enough"

So I finally cough up her extra dollar that is probably on Macleod Trail in front of the Holiday Inn if anyone is looking for a dollar, and we go in to this "high class" bar.  lol  It was pretty scuzzy.  We wanted to go dancing so we headed for the dance floor and no sooner than Chris took two steps on the dance floor did this guy start grinding up against her and his friend decided that I was going to be his conquest.  Ugh....nothing more uncomfortable than being a 30 year old woman in a bar full of teenagers with a 21 year old grinding up against you!  There were plenty of other "high class" girls to grind against that were closer to their age group but we got selected and it took us 10 minutes to escape.

In fact, there was one girl dancing on the side of the bar who was wearing a very fashionable teal sequined bikini! Very cool!!!  There was a guy with a big Canon camera taking pictures of her so maybe she was hired to do that but it was a bit distracting.

I wonder how she got there though as it was a pretty cold night, we both had scarves so it would've been a pretty nipply walk in a bikini!

Overall was a fun night, despite the mishaps and the car accident!

When is enough, enough?

So I had an interesting night last night...started out at the office where we had a charity auction for United Way. Got myself an iPad for $300 woo hoo to me! Anyways I don't exactly HAVE $300 but I did some fancy money moving and cash advances and managed to scrape together enough...I mean a deal is a deal right? Anyways so my friend/coworker and I stuck around and had some beverages and when everyone else cleared out I texted this guy I used to see...I will call him M.

A complicated situation there because I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years to date this guy and then pretty much immediately he stopped speaking to me because an ex of mine from 10 years ago decided that he couldn't bear to see me happy if it wasn't with him. So then and the ex cut me from his life and asked M (who I suppose was his friend first) to do the same. M, not wanting any drama in his life seemed to agree but told me it was just because he was working up North and didn't have time for a girlfriend...whatever. So I was lost at the time.

I went and texted him last night which I know was not a good idea because, despite his attempts to keep his distance, when we do actually get together, we don't behave like adults who are "just friends" if you catch my drift. So we met he and his friends at this club...seems we were the oldest ones there. One of those clubs where trying to dance on the dance floor is apparently an invitation for molestations from sleazy 24 year olds. Anyways I took off with M after the bar and we went to his place, had some wine and then well....we didn't behave ourselves at all for the following 4 hours and then we just sort of lay there and talked for 3 hours before I left to catch the train home. Now, despite 3 texts with specific questions, he seems to be ignoring me until next time he needs to be fucked for 4 hours I guess. Do all single girls have a weakness like this? A guy we want to be more than friends with but because they don't seem receptive to that idea we settle for a fuck buddy at their beck and call? It is not as if I have any hope that this will work out, I just can't seem to let go of the guy he was in March when I first met him. We had the all time best first date that wasn't a date. Is there any way to finally get this guy out of my head? When is enough, enough? It is killing me but I have been down this road before and it never ends well. So what is the trick to letting go?

Millenium Trilogy

So I PROMISED myself I wouldn't do it....rolled my eyes at those who did; but now, I've done it and don't regret it a bit!

What you ask?

Decided to read the Millenium trilogy by Stieg Larsson.

I hate when there is a lot of hype about books.  I find I get myself all psyched up for a book because say, Oprah recommended it or it was on the NY Times Bestsellers list for 20 weeks at number one or whatever the case may be.  I swore after the last let down of a book that I was not going to read the ones that had too much hype unless personally recommended to me by someone I absolutely KNOW has the same taste in books as me.

So a few weeks ago, I bought myself a Kindle...

I LOVE IT!!!  I thought I might regret spending so much money on an e-reader but it's actually fantastic.  It fits in my purse, is light, looks like paper to read so it's not hard on the eyes....I love it!  I think after I read 20 books or so it will pay for itself as e-books even from Amazon are about 1/3 of the price of paper books and there are multiple samples for free!

So I get my kindle and decide to buy some books from Amazon (which, btw is really cool how they are wirelessly delivered).  But then I was wondering about converting books.  My sister has a Sony reader and I figured that it might be possible for her and I to share books if I could find a way to convert them.  So I downloaded Calibre which is a fabulous program.  Kudos to the guy who created it.  Another user friendly piece of software.  Anyway, to use Calibre I had to download a book in a different format.  So I downloaded the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo as it's pretty easy to find online where most e-books, if you don't download them from Chapters or Amazon, they're almost impossible to find with the exception of those copyright free books that are everywhere.  So, I had the book downloaded, in .pdf and transferred it to Mobi to read on the Kindle and put it on the Kindle.  Thought I would read it because I had it.

The book starts off pretty slow.  I was regretting it right away for the first 20 minutes or so.  It was a beautiful day though and I wanted to sit in the sun and read for awhile and, of course, everyone knows what it's like to have a new toy and want to use it.  So I kept reading.  Now, the first book I enjoyed, it wasn't absolutely my favourite book - didn't even crack the top 5 for sure but it was good.  Good enough I wanted to buy the second book!  I started reading the second book last week and I was hooked from page 1.  I read on the train for 3 days to and from work and then Saturday I read all day long and finished the book.  Sunday I downloaded the third book!  I'm over halfway through and I'm loving this one too. 

Finally, a book that lives up to its hype!  Highly recommend these books!  The first book is necessary, it's a good book but doesn't even hold a match (slight pun on "The Girl Who Played With Fire") to the next one so stick with it folks!!

Homesick!

So I went home a couple of weeks ago.  My first time home to PEI in a year so I was really missing it!!!

So I'm home now and once again really questioning why I moved out here in the first place but hey, what can you do?  I'm here now and determined to stick it out! 

But still missing it.  I brought back a box of PEI Blue Mussells on the plane so I got to take a little bit of PEI home with me - although it only lasted a couple of days as I cooked some up for my friend Keith and I the night I got home.  Yum!  I must say though carrying around that "live lobster" box through the Montreal/Toronto/Calgary airport is a way to start conversations.  I think I might just load my stuff into a lobster box next time even if I don't bring home mussels because people really seem to feel that if you're carrying live shellfish you must be awesome.  I am, thankfully, quite awesome!  The flight attendant on one flight gave me a bit of a hard time..asking me how it was packed and who packed it and such....um...the lady at the wharf packed it for me with frozen vegetables????  Yes, I watched her...Yes, I know what's inside, No, there's no dry ice, No, it can't be put in sky check, Yes, that would kill them...crazy woman and all her questions...but my 5lbs of mussels made it to the west and I think they were all still alive...woo hoo!!!

Oh I miss the ocean.  When I try to buy mussels in Calgary they are $6.99/lb and then you take home the little mesh bag and find that half of them have died :-(  My 5lb bag was $6...now that's a deal!  I regret I didn't eat shellfish until about 5 years ago.  I love it now that I can't have it!

Back to the Gym!

So I'm probably the world's worst blogger as I never have anything interesting to write about.  I have been pretty much doing nothing but working for 2 weeks - mainly 12 hour days.  Big legal brief due and I had to put it all together...was stressful because of course everything is left to the very last possible second.  I'm all about procrastinating but this is a whole new level.  So working nights mean I also haven't made it to the gym in almost 3 weeks. Well, until tonight at least.  Tonight I did a BodyPump class which may not have been such a good idea as I still need to walk tomorrow but fun nevertheless

There wasn't that many people in my class of course but same idea.  I need to start lifting more weight though as I've been going a few months now and don't lift too much yet.  I need to get to the gym more regularly anyways though.  I found out this week that my friend is getting married in Mexico in February and that the trip to the wedding is going to cost me $2600...FOR ONE WEEK!!!   Wow, I've no clue how I'm going to afford it but thinking this may take two credit cards and a line of credit to pay in full.  I could skip it and go another week for half the price but I'd love to see him get married as he was almost like a brother to me growing up.  Decisiosn decisions....

The Facebook UNfriending

So trying to figure out when it’s ok to un-friend someone on facebook. How long do you have to go without speaking before you’re not friendly enough to be on someone’s list? I think I’ve only ever unfriended 3 people and all of them were people I either had never met in person or had only met once or twice through someone else who I rarely spoke to. I always just feel so guilty. Like today I saw an old high school friend in a picture in someone else’s album and was thinking that I hadn’t seen any pictures of her wedding that last time I’d seen her status update she had been planning for the summer. So I clicked on her profile only to see that I had been unfriended. I sat here wondering if I had done something to piss her off or to upset a friend of hers. Spent 20 minutes trying to figure it out when I realized that I hadn’t spoken to her since last winter and that’s probably all it was. Wow, I’m a bad friend that I can’t talk to all my 500 facebook friends on a regular basis. When is it ok to unfriend someone? Am I the only one that gets hurt and offended by this? Yeah, think I worry too much!

Mmmmmm SANGRIA!!

So today was MUCH better than yesterday....I finally learned to ask for help (at least for today) and it made my day way less stressful.  No need for ativan-induced sleep tonight.  May even head there early.  BUT  I had some leftover sangria from the weekend so I thought I should finish it off....yum.  It's been a few days so I thought it wouldn't taste as good but really it tastes even better now.  

Normally I make red wine sangria like that (that was from a sangria party I had in July)  It's my favourite drink.  It's all the things a good drink should be...strong, full of alcohol, sweet, fruity and intoxicating!  But my friend Ania who is usually part of my sangria parties hates red wine...well hate is a strong word and she's so wonderfully sweet she would never use that word.  It's probably not even a word that she learned in English when she moved here from Poland (I'm exaggerating of course because she knows english, just that she'd never tell you that she hated something you made for her).  Lets just say she prefers a nice chardonnay or champagne to red wine.  When it comes to sitting down and drinking wine I'm with her as I find white wine much smoother than it's coloured counterpart.  But LOVE sangria with red wine because it takes the best part of red wine (the deep flavours) and then infuses it with citrus to make it refreshing (which unfortunately, is not a word I would normally use to describe red wine).  Usually when I have my sangria parties (and 'parties' is used lightly as it's usually just myself, Ania and her husband, Rafal) I make a double batch of red wine sangria.  Ania has one glass to be polite but usually not much more than that so when I make the batch I'm sure to put in a TON of lemons.  She loves lemons and eats them (rind and all) a lot.  That way, when she's done her one drink she can eat the lemons that have been sitting in wine, brandy and liqueurs for 2 days and still get a bit tipsy.  Last time, I promised her that I would make her a white sangria next time.  I've never made white sangria before so wanted to be sure I could try out a good recipe.  I had my friend Keith over for a roast chicken dinner on Saturday so I tried out white sangria recipes I found on the internet and I must say..... SUCCESS!!!

Yummy!  Excuse the dirty glass..this is glass #2 tonight so I didn't scrub off all the fruit pulp from the last glass!  I also didn't have any peaches or oranges which the recipe called for so I settled for apples, lemons and limes.  Still fantastic if I do say so myself.  I think next time I will get an orange and maybe a splash of pineapple juice and grand marnier.  I find softer fruits like peaches and berries get mushy and sort of take away from the sangria experience. 

I imagine I will be drinking too much of everything tomorrow as it's my friend Kylie's going away party - she's moving to Toronto.  She's my only unmarried, single girlfriend in Calgary so I'm not really sure what I'll do without her.  Maybe I need to put an ad up somewhere and beg for friends....lol  I shouldn't laugh, a month without her and I will be seriously considering it.

It's sort of nice for tonight to come home and relax with a great drink and put my feet up!  Ahhhh Life is Good!!!

This Too Shall Pass

What a horrible day.  A day filled with unrealistic expectations, confrontations, anxiety, tears and pain..how I hate days like this.  On top of everything, a coworker of mine had her home broken into and all her jewellery and electronics stolen - even family heirlooms.  I hate hearing things like that.  She was obviously devastated but so was I....on top of an unbelievably stressful workday I had this overwhelming empathy for her where I literally got sick thinking of how easily someone's life can be turned upside down and their sense of security violated.

This has happened to me many times before and it's always a horrible feeling but I find that when something happens to someone I care about, it hurts me more than if it had happened to me.

I supposed the only constant in the universe is that everything changes.  That no matter how bad the situation or obstacle, it is always surmountable.  I have proven this many times in my 30 years as I've moved forward after the worst possible situations.  It's sad how we always forget how quickly things will change for us.  When we're down, it's hard to remember that the situation is going to get better and when we're happy, it's hard to remember not to take it for granted because it's going to turn bad again.  In every situation we have to be grateful for what we have and not worry so much about what we don't have because this too shall pass.  If only I could remember that some days -  I worry too much!

Anyone for Spam?

So random fact for today! Hawaii is the biggest consumer of Spam products in the USA!

Apparently, McDonalds in Hawaii even have both a McSpam breakfast sandwich and a Spam McGriddle breakfast sandwich (I actually had to google it to be sure and came up with this photo) …Yuck! I will stick with my bacon and egg McMuffin for any breakfast sandwiches from McDonaldsI just can’t understand how ANYONE would enjoy a product which has an ingredient list of: Pork, ham, salt, water, potato starch, sugar and sodium nitrate. Sounds…..um…. Salty (actually 790mg of salt in a 56g serving - but that‘s only 1/6th of a can). . I guess I shouldn’t knock it until I try it. I’ve never actually TRIED Spam I don‘t think. If I have, I have mentally blocked out the experience due to taste bud trauma or some sort of PTSD experience! I totally shouldn’t joke about PTSD for fear that karma will throw it my way again. I’ve already had one experience with it that lasted almost an entire year when the love of my life committed suicide almost 4 years ago and I’d rather avoid it for the rest of my life.


Well…..I WAS hungry before I started writing about Spam; however, now I think I will forego my snack. Maybe I need to start reading ingredient lists of disgusting food more often it might keep me from snacking at night. My intention was to go to the gym tonight but I didn’t make it except for a 20 minute walk/jog on the treadmill in the building here. I think my New Year’s Resolution of learning to run this year is going to have to be rolled over to next year (just like it was rolled over to 2010 from my goals in 2009 and 2008) I’m just so completely out of shape. I run for about 90 seconds and I’m pretty sure I’m dying from lack of oxygen. The Couch to 5K says that I’m supposed to start with 60 seconds and move slowly up from there but I am so impatient! I’m all about instant gratification and if I can’t get something right the first time I hate trying again, especially at the gym where I watch people run for an hour without stopping and so I’m embarrassed to be the one person who runs for 60 seconds and has to stop before I fall on my face. So what’s the best way to start running? Outside or treadmill? The Couch to 5K plan or the plan that you’re supposed to run telephone pole to telephone pole? I should’ve just hired a trainer at the gym but they said in order to get skinny and fit again it would cost me $7000.…no thanks, that’s a lot of new shoes.

Stressed week +aerosmith = good friday!

So the day was CRAZY!!!!  But now at least I have something to look forward to for tomorrow.  Going to go to my coworker Maeghan's bar admission after work and the AEROSMITH CONCERT FOR FREE!!!  This girl I met online from the UK is apparently the manager of the box office at the Saddledome and said she had a few tickets to give away to anyone that could tell her why they deserved them.  I honestly didn't give her any reason at all other than that I saw what she thought was a personal message to her other friend and felt the need to butt in and tell her she was replying to all...oops!  lol  So she said she will put a couple of tickets aside for me tomorrow....woo hoo!  At least with all the stress of trying to pump out 4 briefs and 4 motions in 2 weeks I will have something to look forward to in the end.

The boss man is actually not going to be around tomorrow.  Apparently a very important Jewish holiday I know nothing about.  I really have to start reading up on other faiths because I'm completely in the dark.  I know his son came from L.A. to go to church with them....wait, I'm not allowed to call it church as it is a synagogue (did I even spell that right?  Wow, I'm from a small town).  So anyways his son D. came from LA to go to church  hmmm... synagogue service? prayer service?  what is it called?....anyways so he came from LA and brought his suit but apparently forgot to bring a tie.  So boss's wife calls Harry Rosen to have them deliver a couple of ties to the office so that D can pick one to wear with his suit.  Does anyone shop at Harry Rosen?  Do people really know how insane their prices are?  I knew Holt Renfrew was expensive but had no idea that 2 ties at Harry Rosen (on sale) cost $275....um what?  Yep, that is $137 per tie!  What makes a $137 tie any better than a $50 one you buy at a department store??  I can't imagine ever spending $137 on a piece of fabric that small and insignificant!  Shoes on the other hand....that's another story entirely.

Today was a good day.... comparatively speaking.

Today was a pretty good day for me.  I made plans for lunch on friday, dinner on saturday and drinks on Sunday afternoon so it's always nice to look forward to a fun weekend!  Also, today I finally have groceries so I could eat real food when I got home which usually puts me in a good mood.

Started off good because I'm usually stuck standing on a crowded train where people push and shove and everyone is grumpy.  But today my bus wasn't late so I was able to get off the train at Anderson Stn and catch the empty train that comes along around 7:20!!  Woo hoo!

Today I had a bit of time lapse because it was busy at work.....

Oh, and also there is a new post on Hyperbole and a Half today which is the BEST BLOG IN THE UNIVERSE and always makes me smile.

So yes, I amuse easily but sometimes you have to take the little awesome things and forget about all the shitty stuff.  There was lots of shitty stuff happen too; but I prefer not to focus on that for today.  I think we can always find something good about each and every day....even the worst ones.

Online Dating?

So I went out on a date tonight....it wasn't really a date per se as we just called it "meeting" but we went to a restaurant and had some drinks and appetizers so I'm pretty sure that's a date.  Plus he asked if we could do it again so that's a good sign that even if it wasn't a date that maybe he's interested in a date next time.  Anyways, oddly enough I actually met this guy online and he's normal.  I am actually really blown away with the GOOD luck I've had in the past with online dating or meeting people online (as I actually met two of my girlfriends here online - yes my ONLY two girlfriends- but not on a dating site of course).  I tend to meet quite normal and fun people which is not what I expected at all.  Even when I first tried it out back home I met two really nice guys (despite having the odds not in my favour as I'm pretty sure the ratio of men to women on the east is like 1:5 or something crazy like that).

Just wondering if maybe I'm the exception to the rule.  A girl I met here (but she's moved away now) said she tried it while she was here because it's really hard to meet people in this city and she was telling me some horror stories that made me quite skeptical but so far I seem to meet the perfectly normal ones.  I think I've met 4 or 5 people since I got here online...all awesome people except one who was a bit on the arrogant side so I never called him again.  Anyone had any luck with online dating in the past?  Is there really hope?  I'm just at a loss for trying to meet people in this city.  I was told when I was moving here that people are really friendly but I find it the most UNfriendly city I've ever been in so I'm not really sure what they're comparing it to.  I might have to ask so I make a point to not go to those cities.  I mean I am fairly outgoing and will pretty much start up a conversation with anyone be it a stranger at the bus stop or someone in the grocery line so I am not thinking it's my fault; although, I'm told that it's not normal to do that in the west so people who I am talking to probably think I'm a crazy. 

Maybe there's a secret Calgary location that people go to so that they can meet other people....I need to find this secret.  Not even necessarily boyfriends but even girlfriends or people to just hang out with.  People in this city refuse to open their circles to the outsiders even though most people here were outsiders at one point as I've only met 3 people who are actually born and raised in Calgary so I think it's pretty rare.  Any ideas?

Wedding Present ideas???

So I found out that my cousin, who is all of 25, is getting married on my 30th birthday (nothing like stealing my thunder or anything) but anyways so I'm heading home to the east for my birthday and got an invitation to the wedding (a.k.a. buy me a gift even though I haven't seen or spoken to you in 5 years).  I'm just trying to figure out the following:

1.  Do I go?
2.  What do I buy for a gift?
3.  Is it totally impersonal to just give cash and a card since I'm pretty sure he has a house and it's fully stocked with towels and dishes (at least I would like to hope he's not eating off the floor and drying himself with paper towels but I've never been invited over so I have no real idea)?
4.  If I don't go, do I still have to buy/send a gift since I was invited?
5.  Will he really notice if I'm not there?
6.  If I'm not there, would he remember that he invited me and look for my gift?
7. I could go and TAKE a card and add my name to the one with lots of money in it...it's my fucking birthday afterall...(totally kidding - I would absolutely get caught).
8. I could buy him some cheap IKEA stuff since there is no IKEA east of Quebec City so he would have no idea that I bought it at IKEA.

So any help would be appreciated.  My other option for my birthday would be to go out with my now ex-boyfriend who I only broke up with because of the distance until he moves out here, and see if he's up for a birthday gift of "friends with benefits" because I'm pretty sure he'd be into that.  I think sex beats a wedding don't you?

I'm not Happy when I'm Hungry

So today was kind of a shitty day.  Not because someone got upset with me or I got hurt or anything serious.  No my day was bad because I'm hungry!  I know I'm sounding like a 2 year old but I get super grumpy when I'm hungry.  I'm sure everyone has these days.  My day:

6:00:   So I wake up already hungry so before I do anything I put a piece of bread in the toaster so that I can have breakfast.  I go to do other things and end up burning the toast a bit but no time for more so I eat my piece of burnt toast and head to work. 

7:50:  I get to work and start an unbelievably busy day with all the unrealistic deadlines that go with it.  Deadlines that no human could ever reach.

11:00:  My stomach has started rumbling and I think maybe I'll go eat something and come back to this project but no, it's due by noon so I will eat then. 

12:00:  I somehow met my deadline but as I was handing it of to my boss he tells me that the assistant he had helping him yesterday had not proofed his Brief and it was all messed up and he needs it proofed ASAP.

12:15:  My stomach is making noises so loud that the girl sitting next to me can hear; well, I think she heard because she came over to my desk and said "you should at least go get something to eat and take it to your desk while you work."  Obviously she is right, but I thought proofing would be a fast job when it turns out that it's a 60 page document with handwritten changes in ink so bright it's hard to read (not that his writing is EVER easy to read).  So I think that I should just take a late lunch and work through to get as much done as I can.  I had taken in a frozen dinner last week for days just like this one and I know somewhere in the back of my mind that it would only take 10 minutes to heat up the dinner in the microwave and eat it quickly - since there are only usually about 6 bites in those dinners.  But no I think a 1:00 lunch break will be just fine.

1:00: only on page 35 of my document although my stomach feels like it's starting to eat itself and I'm getting a bit dizzy....this just slows me down because it takes longer to read if you are having some hypoglycemic dizzy spell.

2:30:  almost done but client calls and asks that I do something for her on a rush basis.  This woman pretty much pays my salary so I have to do whatever she needs.  I am starting to get grumpy so I know I have to eat soon or I'll move on to the next stage of hunger which is the emotional stage and that usually doesn't end well in an office environment.  As soon as I start to cry it doesn't stop!

3:30 Finally finished!!  Yay!  But still have another project to go so I get started on that thinking, hey, I'm off at 4:00 anyways so might as well keep going.  Besides, by this point my hunger pangs have turned to nausea and I'm pretty sure my fat cells are loving it because my body has gone into starvation mode.

3:45 - FUCK IT!!!  I'm snapping at everyone in the office for things that are totally not their fault I have to go home and eat.

4:30:   I get off the train and see that my bus is waiting so I try to hurry over but there are slow walking people in front of me that won't move.  I'm almost to the bus running as fast as I can (which isn't very fast) and the bus closes its doors and drives away!  WTF!?  Next bus comes in 25 minutes.  Guess I have to walk home, despite the fact that by this point my knees feel like jell-o and my head is throbbing.  Even my ears are ringing and my eyelids feel heavy due to malnourishment.

4:50:  Home.  Figure I should stop by and get my mail as I've left it a couple of days now.  Open the mailbox and see that I have a letter from the government (...please be a cheque, please be a cheque..) No dice!  A letter from CRA telling me that my moving expenses which I claimed on my income taxes are being audited and I need to find every piece of paper that I've ever had in my possession for the last year and send it to them 30 days from the date of the letter - which, of course, was more than 10 days ago.  Seriously?! 

5:00: My apartment...finally can cook some supper!  Open my fridge to remember that oh right, I haven't gotten groceries this week yet and that burnt toast I had this morning was my last piece of bread so I can't even go that route.

5:10:  So here I sit with the crumbs left in the bottom of the Ritz box, a peach that has seen better days and my syringe with my B12 injection in it that I was supposed to take last week but I hate giving myself needles (even 4 years later it still creeps me out).   I totally need a drink!

Does size really matter? really?

The answer is yes....and yes, I AM talking about what you think I'm talking about.  If you are easily offended, probably best you skip this post.

So I met this guy online a while back but we've never met in person.  He's fairly conceited from what I can tell...nice guy but thinks really highly of himself.  So anyways, yesterday he sends me a message on msn (yes I still use MSN sometimes) so here's how it goes....basically (I'm going to call him "C" as to not give away his real name or full initials):

C: are you alone?

Me:  Yes

C: can you do me a favour, would you tell me if my cock is small, average or large if I show you on cam? I'm having a bet with my friend.

Me:  Um, what kind of bet is that?

C:   It's a girl, she says I have a small cock and I told her that I could get votes from other girls that said otherwise.  I need 10 and only have 5 so far.

Me:  What were the other 5 votes?

C: 4 average and 1 large   *invites cam*

(I know I shouldn't have accepted but at this point I was just curious as to whether or not he was really small and I could knock him off his pedestal or whether he was big and trying to show off some more - I obviously did not believe anything about a 'bet')

Me:  looks pretty normal to me, I've seen smaller

(which is totally such a lazy answer because that could mean small but I've seen newborn babies and they are much smaller or it could mean average but I was too busy laughing that someone would actually ask a stranger to check out his penis size) - btw it was average sized if you were wondering.

C:  Do you want to see me cream?

Me: *appear offline*
I just couldn't watch this shit anymore.  I was a bit embarrassed at that point that I had accepted in the first place and at that point I was thinking that he's probably a bit of an exhibitionist and likes an audience.

So....has this ever happened to anyone else where a somewhat stranger asks you to rate his penis size?  Is this a normal guy question? I mean I know guys are self-concious about this sort of thing but really??!  Sorry guys...new blog and I'm already writing about penises.  I would never ask a guy to check out my va-jay-jay via webcam and tell me if it's normal or weird.  Especially not someone I had never even met yet in person....wow there are some real winners out there. Least it gave me a laugh for the night.

Murphy's Law

So pretty much my life is run by Murphy’s Law - Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. I am pretty sure that my luck is going to change very soon and I will win the lottery or something but so far…I’m not there yet. I turn 30 on 10/10/10 so I’m pretty sure that’s lucky! What’s unlucky is that it falls on a Sunday so there are no Sunday lottery draws. Damnit! Going to head home and spend thanksgiving with my family though so that will be nice. I’m pretty excited for 30 really - probably the only one in the world excited for 30 - because I’m told your 30s are the best years of your life. Well it wouldn’t take much to beat my 20s but we’ll get into that at a later date.


A few weeks ago I went to the mall after work to look for something….no idea really what it was I was looking for now that I’m looking back but pretty sure I didn’t come home with it. I ended up going into this shoe store…yes yes…the addiction of shoes. I found the PERFECT Nine West shoes (this kind but not this colour) and they are so pretty and they match everything I own and they’re more comfortable than my sneakers I think (albeit it may be because I rarely wear sneakers so heels have become more comfortable). So I wear them out on what I will call a date (he doesn’t call it a date though but that’s totally his problem because I’m totally awesome and he just hasn’t realized my awesomeness yet.. anyways) So we end up walking about 30 blocks from the restaurant to a club on 17th Ave (which if you’re not from Calgary is basically a street filled with bars and pubs and restaurants) and then I walk all the way back to the train to go home. I get home and pass out from too many Bulldogs (see the menu from Julio’s Barrio - yum) and when I get up the next morning to go out with some girlfriends, I notice my poor pretty shoes are all ripped. The genius shoe doctor here looked at them last week and told me that there’s nothing he can do for them and that it would keep happening so I think - ok, I’ll take them back to the store. Nope, get my receipt out of the garbage and see it’s stamped “Final Sale - No Returns”. I will probably still wear them until they are completely unwearable and ugly but whatever. They’re not as pretty anymore now that they’re ripped and a new pair is now $120 which I’d be willing to pay if the first pair hadn’t ripped but I don’t want to pay for something that may rip again. How frustrating.

My VERY FIRST POST!!

So I decided today that I wanted to start a blog….I have no idea what it will be about or if I will write more than 3 entries before I get bored. I don’t think I have the attention span for a blog. I like to read other people’s though and sometimes I get in silly moods and it seems like a good idea. Today is one of those days. Not sure what it will be about but I’m guessing a diary of sorts as my life tends to be filled with plenty of drama.

The NAME....I'm sure some of you get it.  It comes from that saying "Not the brightest crayon in the box".  Instead of saying that, I usually say "he/she is not the yellow crayon" and people tend to look at me funny.  I just assume yellow is the brightest crayon, it's surely the happiest colour!  I personally would be the pink crayon if I had choice...but I'll make it fluorescent pink since I tend to be somewhat bright.  Well on certain days, in certain moods, about certain things.


Well I moved to Calgary from the east coast a little less than a year ago. I haven’t yet decided if it was a good idea or a bad one but hey the opportunity presented itself and I am bad at making decisions so I just impulsively said yes, thinking I would totally talk myself out of it before I actually packed up and moved to the other side of the country - but I didn’t. So now I’m here and all I do is work and sleep and drink too much. Packed on 18lbs of what I call loneliness weight and now thinking I should’ve used the summer to do something about that. Being that it’s not even officially fall yet, you would think that I would still have time but apparently it’s been the shittiest summer in Calgary history and, just my luck, the nicest and hottest summer in many years back on the east coast…..FML